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I had more difficulty sleeping before becoming a manticore...perhaps that will help you as well?

[His sleep lately hasn't been good - nightmares - but it seems that manticores at least sometimes fall asleep faster than people!]

While I would rather do almost anything than sleep, it does get frustrating when I can't.

[Another reason changing to a Gargoyle was hard for him, he had a schedule of when to sleep and when to wake up, and that got all wonky!]

So I guess that would be good.

Indeed! It cannot be easy to adjust to sleeping in the day, in any case...

[Ingo's tried not to get too invested in Emmet's changes. It's Emmet's body, after all; he should do what he wants! Even if he changed his mind and went for a different monster type, perhaps! Being a scavenger like a pooka probably would be easier on him...

Still. As the promised date approaches, he's starting to become sort of excited for them to be the same again.]

Do you...think there are books here about this autism? I would like to understand more - I am sure I must have, once.

[And he doesn't want to try and make Emmet verbalize everything! He knows how difficult that can be for him, and this also seems like it might be a little emotionally difficult to discuss?]

They are probably grossly out of date. Just filled with bad ideas and notions. Like the idea of a 'refrigerator mother' and stuff.

[Emmet looks down as he glitches again, this time to being a shade like before.]

I...can do my best to explain.

[Ingo's gaze darts very obviously over to the refrigerator. This clears up nothing! But it seems like it was bad, so he'll just - not ask!]

I'm afraid I do not have any specific questions just yet...but if you would like to speak more on the topic, I'm glad to listen! Just please do not feel obligated! I simply think...well, it seems to have granted you some understanding. I have never felt particularly like I do not understand myself, or you, but if there is something significant I do not know, I should remedy that!

I just worry if it would have been significant to you.

[Why didn't he mention this earlier? It has been half a year, and he remembered how much Ingo did try to be 'normal' when they were younger. Did he think he was doing Ingo a favor?]

[Ingo was known for being polite, Ingo brought out the best in people. Yes, he may have talked more than other people would have liked- but a minor fault! Everyone is allowed to have faults, and if they didn't it was an act.]

[Ingo wouldn't have to worry about being 'normal' or not.]

...well, as far as some of those things go - my inability to express myself properly, and how I cannot seem to hear how loud I am being - I have always believed that it was damage left over from whatever took my memories! That is what we all thought! There was no sign that I had been physically harmed, of course, but we thought perhaps a psychic Pokemon was involved, or something of that nature...

[Well. It doesn't matter now. Ingo doesn't resent any of that old speculation; none of it was ever meant unkindly! He'd wanted to know the answers more than anyone, after all!]

At any rate. I suppose I'm glad to know that isn't the case.

Did anyone treat you mean for it?

...no one of importance. Perhaps Warden Melli, now and then, but that was simply his way. Everyone else became used to it fairly quickly, I suppose...there were always much stranger things about me to concern themselves with, if they cared to do so!

[An amnesiac wandering in a blizzard, very obviously not from Hisui and with some strange ideas about Pokemon? It took people a while to get used to everything else about him, and by that point his volume and manner weren't so odd anymore.]

I'm glad they didn't then. I am glad they are nice people.

...I'm sorry you have known so many unkind people.

[He continues to be concerned! But Emmet is now too insubstantial to be touched, so Ingo moves past him to go sit back on the couch instead. At least they can be sitting together when Emmet stops being a shade!]

But you will tell me if anyone says anything here?

I will, but everyone has been verrry nice so far.

[But then again, Emmet mostly interacts with people online now-a-days]

[Battling used to keep him social and now- well! There is always trying to beat STH's scores!]

That is good!

[Ingo's known pretty much since they all began living together that Emmet socializes much less than he does! Quite frankly, he's worried some about it! But their preferences are different, too, so he's never said anything about it. It's hard for him to tell if this is just how Emmet likes it, or if he really would like more friends and just isn't sure how to get them. Certainly, he's pushed a few other people towards Emmet...but never Emmet himself.

But things will be different when they are both manticores. They can go out together more often.]

Is there...I don't know, anything I ought to know for your sake? I suppose I already know how I am, even if I have not had these words to put to it.

[He probably doesn't know enough, but how would he know that?]

[Emmet shrugs, but it is obviously one of those- THERE MIGHT BE BUT I'M NOT TOO SURE ones.]

[After all, Ingo has a lot on his plate, and he doesn't want Ingo to think he had to add on more- but they also both agreed to be more honest with each other.]

...Emmet...

[That's not a no! What does that mean!]

[It is obvious Emmet is trying to figure out the words. Again, it has been something Ingo has seen in the past many times before but doesn't remember.]

[Glitch to teenage him, jeans, a large white sweater, a shirt with what looked like a mascot character on it. He spread his fingers out over the sweater sleeves.]

Hm! I like this!

[Ingo reaches up to put a little Sneasel paw on Emmet's shoulder, looking the sweater over.]

The way I dressed at this age...I do not think I care for it now. It was very...loud? Yes, rather loud! But this seems rather like something you would still wear now! It even resembles your coat!

[He doesn't know how to help. He's noticed, since their very first real talk after the red fog, that sometimes him talking instead can help. Emmet will borrow his words, if they're useful. But then, they were both upset about similar things. Now, he's not sure what to say that might be of use. He can still fill a silence, though.]

I wish that I could still wear mine. I feel very strange without it! It just keeps on vanishing when I become young!

The weight is nice. I like how it makes my arms feel when I walk.

[Emmet had always been very particular about things like that.]

What I do, always the same.

The weight is nice!

[He says, like he's never really thought of it that way before! But he does! If this is something that they are meant to have in common, maybe if he just...speaks about what he thinks, it'll help?]

I always feel strange when I am not wearing mine! Or something like it, at least! Though I do miss my old one...it was nice to play with the tatters of the sleeves. I could still wear it, I suppose, but I know that I would feel too horrible if it were destroyed! It has been with me through so much!

What do you like about the feeling of the tatters? Maybe we can find a way to mimic it for you to keep on you.

The...texture, I suppose? Please do not misunderstand me! I like the new coat very much, and I greatly appreciate it!

[He's worried about sounding ungrateful for the gift now! But...well, obviously the texture isn't the same, the other coat was very weather-worn! Besides, those big cuffs are not as easy to play with!]

I'm know you do, but if we can find something with the same texture to keep on you, it might be nice, right?

...yes, I suppose that would be nice.

[He's plainly never even thought of that!]

Is that, uh... [He also never thought that was a particularly unusual thing to enjoy?]

[Emmet cocks his head to the side waiting for the question.]

...related?

[He's just trying to phrase everything super carefully!]

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tw: internalized ableism

cw: internalized ableism

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